Back in Thirty

Each of the criminals sat waiting for the interrogation they was knew to come. We had placed each of them in a different area of the building. Each was a room with a view. We placed their chairs towards the window specifically.
“Chief, they’re repeats. Your psychic told us that.”
“Well, we can’t just kill them off—the government doesn’t allow us that pleasure.”
“Hey Chief, let me go in.”
“You, Andy, haha! You don’t know the first thing about interrogation.”
“Just let me try, please Chief?”
“Alright, Brighton, go with him. I want to know exactly how it goes.”
“Yes Sir!”

***

“So, Andy, what are you going to do?”
“You’ll see Brighton, you’ll see.” I opened the door, and each time Brighton bustled into the room.
“Alright, look here.” I put leaned in real close to each of the guys, three in all, giving them the eye. “Here’s how it’s going to go. You broke the law, again, and our psychic tells us you’re going to do it again. Did you know that?”
“Know what?” Each had asked the same question.
“Did you know that you are planning on committing another crime to get put back into the house? Do some more time?” None of them had an answer for me, they each swallowed hard and diverted their eyes.
“That’s what I thought. So, here’s what I’m going to tell you. Quit wasting tax money and go meet your maker.” I threw a pocket knife across the table toward them and watched as their eyes became huge.
“Come on Brighton, we’ve got more important things to take care of.” Brighton’s face was classic. Turning back while holding the door I looked each of them in the eye, “You better be dead before I get back in thirty.”
I closed the door tightly behind me.
“What the hell, Andy!” Brighton shot off at me, “You just armed all three of those criminals.”
“And told them that if they knew what was good for them they’d do us and them a favor!”
“What’s chief going to say when I tell him what you did?”
“Might as well wait until their thirty minutes is up.”
Brighton sighed and shook his head.
Our thirty minutes went quickly and the first criminal we had visited was lying dead, his wrists slit, in a pool of sticky blood.
“One down, two to go.” I chanted to Brighton.
“You are one sick son of a bitch, you know that Andy?”
We opened the door to the second room, the guy was almost dead, his body twitching because he had only slit one wrist instead of two.
“Damn, now we have to call for someone to try to save the bastard.” I looked at Brighton over my shoulder who was trying not to be queasy. He took up his radio and began requesting an EMT to questioning room 2.
I walked out and toward the third room.
An alarm went off and suddenly our floor became a frenzy of activity. I quickly walked to the third room. The window was broken, the knife lying on the floor with glass around it, and looking down five stories, I could see the broken body of criminal number three.

***

“Andy, how did you know that they would each commit suicide?”
“Well Chief, didn’t they tell you about me at my last job?”
“We did a thorough background check.”
“Did they tell you I was the suicide dealer?”
“They didn’t call you that, did they Andy?”
“Yes sir, they did. You see, whenever I was called out to help the folks at Animal Control, I could just look at the animals and they would suddenly run head first into the first car they could see coming towards them. They would decide that it was better to commit suicide than to ride with me.”
“How many animals did that?”
“It’s besides the point Chief! The point is, I just wanted to see if worked on people too. Maybe you better look at your psychics again, something tells me they should have seen my proposal to them.”